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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26244784">For the Hope of it All</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/cascadeoceanwave/pseuds/cascadeoceanwave'>cascadeoceanwave</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Taylor Swift (Musician)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>(kaylor is mentioned but this isn't a kaylor fic), Developing Relationship, F/F, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Useless Lesbians, cat sweaters, city of lover, intense scrabble competition, kaylor broke up so i wrote this to Cope™, working through things as a couple</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 13:02:08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,850</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26244784</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/cascadeoceanwave/pseuds/cascadeoceanwave</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>"She slid a hand across the table.  Inviting.  Asking.<br/>Taylor took it and squeezed.  Iris squeezed back."</p><p>Taylor has been burned in love too many times to count.  But could Iris give her the warmth she seeks?  Has she found someone who will stay?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Karlie Kloss/Taylor Swift, Taylor Swift/Original Female Character(s)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>21</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>Taylor and Iris</strong> met on the set of Cats.  Years later, they laughed about how this campy disaster of a film was the thing that had brought them together.  Iris worked in music publishing in London.  She had introduced herself to Taylor one day in the studio and endlessly praised her writing.  Her cheerful, blunt personality was an infectious light for Taylor, a buoy to hang onto as her relationship and coming out plans crumbled before her eyes.</p><p>They exchanged numbers after about a month.  Taylor would go to set on her off days, half for cat school, and half to try and catch a glimpse of Iris’s green eyes and dark brown hair.  And, on days when Taylor was shooting, Iris did her best to come and watch, an iced coffee in hand.</p><p>It wasn’t romantic at first.  Taylor was with Karlie (which was somehow more complicated than it had ever been) and Iris was single and happy to stay that way.  They texted a couple times a week, sharing recipes, cat pictures, and book recommendations.</p><p>But, for the most part, their relationship was surface level.  Until June, when Taylor’s personal and professional life reached a fever pitch and she felt more lost and out of control than she’d been in a while.  The day the news of her masters being sold hit, Iris was one of the first people to reach out.</p><p><em> Just heard the news about your masters, </em> her text read, <em> That’s such a shitty move on Scott’s part.  Are you doing okay? </em></p><p>Taylor wasn’t quite sure what made her call.  Maybe it was because Iris worked in the industry and knew how these things worked, maybe it was because she’d asked, or maybe if she didn’t call Iris she might’ve called Karlie instead.  Regardless, she only hesitated for a second before tapping on Iris’s contact.</p><p>“Hello?” Iris’s soft accent cut through the silence pressing on her chest.  </p><p>“I’m so angry,” Taylor said in lieu of a greeting, “and I don’t know if I should be.  This is how it works, and I <em> know </em> that.  I’ve always known that.  I knew he was going to sell my masters, I just didn’t know to who.  I just--he didn’t even give me the chance!  Did you see what he sold them for?”</p><p>“I did,” Iris said cautiously, pacing her apartment.  This was more emotion either of them had ever shared with each other, and she wasn’t quite sure how to proceed.  “It’s definitely on the higher end of what I would consider.”</p><p>Taylor chuckled darkly, “You can say they’re not worth that much.  It’s not going to hurt my feelings.”</p><p>Iris laughed at that, relaxing into the conversation.  “Yeah, it’s an extremely poor investment on his part.  Especially because I doubt your fans will let him ever live this down.”</p><p>“You’re not wrong.”  Then, in a quieter voice, “Do you think it’s wrong of me to be so upset?  I started writing up a post about it and then it started sounding kind of whiny.  So I called you.”</p><p>“I think,” Iris said, choosing her words carefully, “That just because something is the norm doesn’t mean it’s right.  It’s your art and your decision of how to feel and react.  If you want to say something, say it.  If you want to post something, post it.  Maybe you’ll regret it later, but you’ll probably regret it more if you stifle yourself now.”</p><p>“You’re right,” Taylor said, pensively.  “You’re really smart.  I should call you for advice more often.”  She meant it to come out casually, but her tone rose at the end like a question and she felt herself waiting with bated breath for an answer.</p><p>“Of course,” Iris smiled, “Feel free to call whenever.  I mean it.  London is lonely without you.”</p><p>“Hey, um, the next time we’re in the same country, do you think I could take you out to dinner?”  The words were out of Taylor’s mouth before she could fully process them.  Iris hesitated for a split second too long before answering and Taylor almost wished she could take it back...</p><p>“I’d love that,” Iris said, shyly.  </p><p>“Really?”  Taylor asked, incredulously.  She was filled with a childish excitement, bouncing on her toes.  It had been so long since she’d done anything like this.  </p><p>“Really.”</p><p>When Taylor hung up the call, she felt better.  Still angry, still upset, but a little more calm, a little more level-headed.  She pulled on one of her softest cardigans because it was the closest thing she could get to a hug and went downstairs to eat breakfast.</p><p>Iris finally took Taylor up on her offer when she came to Paris to promote Lover.  Taylor flew her out on the one day she had off from doing promo.  Taylor’s knee bounced up and down under the table and she twisted her rings around her fingers.  She was nervous.  It had been so long since she’d done anything like this.</p><p>“Congrats on the new album,” Iris smiled, lifting her water glass for a toast.</p><p>Taylor smiled and clinked their glasses together.  She wished it was a socially acceptable time to drink wine.  “Thank you!  This week has been so nice.  It still doesn’t seem real.”</p><p>“Well, I’ll be your tether to reality and assure you that it is.  I’m obsessed with Lover--the song--, by the way.  I listen to it and for 3 minutes I can pretend I’m in a happy relationship!”</p><p>“That’s what it’s like singing it,” Taylor smiled wearily.  Iris’s grin faded as she realized the implications of Taylor’s words.</p><p>“Shit so you’re not...you’re not with your boyfriend anymore?” she lowered her voice even though they were in a private room in the back.  </p><p>“Hmm?” Taylor asked, forgetting, for a second, that she supposedly had one.  She quickly realized that she and Iris were on completely different pages.  “Oh, um, it’s kind of complicated.”  She thought that Iris might've heard through the grape-vine, or naively assumed that, because she seemed to understand Taylor on some deep level, maybe she'd figure it out herself.  But that clearly wasn't the case.  She felt like crying.  Her heart started pounding in the same way it did when she’d first said it to Abigail in homeroom in 9th grade.  Telling people never really got easier for her.  (Although, she supposed, if she told the whole world it might be different.  She’d never quite worked up the courage to find out.)</p><p>“I’m sorry.  That sucks,” Iris said quietly.  She slid a hand across the table.  Inviting.  Asking.  </p><p>Taylor took it and squeezed.  Iris squeezed back.  She would tell her, just not in public.  She wasn’t in the business of testing her luck like that.</p><p>They moved onto more cheerful topics for the rest of the meal, like Iris’s kid brother’s new pet snake, and their Game of Thrones houses.  After they’d paid (and Taylor left a sizeable tip), she gathered the courage and asked: “So, do you want to come back to my room?”</p><p>Iris nodded.</p><p>The car ride was spent mostly in silence.  Iris scrolled through her phone just to have something to do.  She couldn't help but be hyper-aware of Taylor's security guard in the driver's seat.  Somehow, anything she could possibly want to talk about seemed too private for his ears.  She selfishly wanted Taylor all to herself.</p><p>Taylor glanced out the window and tried to calm her running thoughts.  She’d invited Iris over because she <em> wanted </em> her to know just how nonexistent her boyfriend was.  The last time she felt this way about someone was when she met Karlie in 2013.  They were both so young then, and Taylor rolled her eyes at how much they thought they knew, how they thought that a relationship could thrive on hope alone.</p><p>Love never ended well for Taylor.  She knew this.  It was practically programmed into her genetic code.  And yet, here she was, teetering on the edge of the pool, knowing that the second she dipped her toe in there was no going back.  But she couldn’t bear to think about the alternative.  Pain was a part of life, she’d learned.  And she’d rather get hurt from trying than from regret and loneliness.</p><p>The car pulled up to a back entrance of the hotel.  Iris jumped to hold the door for Taylor on the way in.  </p><p>“Welcome to my home away from home,” Taylor gestured nervously.  </p><p>“Are the cats here?” Iris asked.</p><p>Taylor smiled, feeling some of the nervous energy rush out of her.  “They’re not, unfortunately.  My brother’s taking care of them back home.”  She sat down on the end of her bed.</p><p>“Bummer.  I’ll have to meet them next time, I guess.”  Iris sat down next to her.  Their knees were almost touching.  Taylor’s hands were shaking so she clenched them into fists.</p><p>“I’ll fly you out to the states sometime.  They’d love you.”</p><p>“Are they the kind of cats that would tolerate wearing clothes?  I want to knit them sweaters.”</p><p>Taylor kissed her.</p><p>Iris was taken aback at first, but relaxed into the kiss as Taylor’s hand went to her cheek.  “Woah,” she said as they pulled apart, because she couldn’t really think of anything else to say.</p><p>“Was that okay?”  Taylor whispered, tentatively.  “I should’ve asked first.”</p><p>“More than okay,” Iris said dreamily.  She tried to pull herself together.  “But things are done with your boyfriend, right?”</p><p>“I…” for the second time that night, Taylor had forgotten about him.  “There isn’t a boyfriend.  Or a real one, anyway.  It’s all PR.”</p><p>The silence grew heavier as Taylor watched Iris process this.  “Oh.  <em> Oh </em>.  So are you…”</p><p>“I’m gay.”  Taylor’s voice caught.  It never got easier.</p><p>“Wow.  Okay.” </p><p>Taylor forced herself to raise her gaze from the floor.  Iris was smiling. </p><p>~*~</p><p>“You can’t tell anyone about this,” Taylor said, still catching her breath, pulling the sheet over her naked body.</p><p>“Wouldn’t dream of it,” Iris said softly.  “I’ll sign anything you need me to.”</p><p>“Thank you.”  Taylor’s hands were steady now.  She found Iris’s and intertwined their fingers.  She hadn’t felt this safe or content in months.</p><p>Iris slowly got up, planting a kiss on Taylor’s hand as she let go.  “I’m going to get you a glass of water,” she said when she noticed Taylor’s furrowed brow.</p><p>Taylor got up to pee, and managed to not cry until she was in the sanctuary of the bathroom.  It had been so long since someone cared for her like this.  She wiped her eyes and blew her nose with toilet paper and tried to calm herself down with deep breaths.  When the only sign of her woes were her slightly red eyes, she emerged from the bathroom. </p><p>Iris was sitting on the bed, covered by the sheet, holding a glass of water.  A second sat on the nightstand.  Suddenly self-conscious, Taylor picked up her shirt crumpled on the ground and pulled it on.  “Hi,” she said shyly, sitting down next to Iris.  She took a sip of her water.</p><p>“Hi,” Iris said, amused.  Taylor’s confidence definitely came out during sex, and the scene in front of her was a stark contrast of what had occurred mere minutes before.</p><p>“How long can you stay?” Taylor asked.</p><p>“I have to fly back tomorrow,” Iris said with a sigh.  “But I’ll be in LA for work three weeks from now.  I know things will probably be really busy for you, but I’d love to see you if--”</p><p>“Of course!  I’ll double check my calendar but I’m pretty sure I’ll be in LA doing promo there around the same time.  I can always fly out, if not.  You can stay at my place and meet the cats.”  Taylor’s voice found renewed confidence.  This wasn’t a one-time thing for Iris either.  Maybe she wasn’t crazy to be hoping there was something between them, especially if Iris was the one suggesting they meet up again.</p><p>“Are you sure?  I would love that!”  Iris couldn’t keep the excitement out of her voice.  Unbeknownst to Taylor, she was having a similar internal dialogue.  She couldn’t believe that Taylor wanted her there.  Maybe she was going to stay--for three weeks, at least.  “It’s going to suck not being able to see you again.  I don’t know how I coped.”</p><p>Taylor smirked.  “In that case, are you ready to go again?”</p><p>“I thought you’d never ask.”</p><p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. two</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“Shit shit shit,” Taylor yelped as she cradled her singed fingers under the cold water.  Iris was getting there soon and she was nervous.  And that made her clumsy, apparently.  She loosened her grip around her fingers and surveyed the damage.  Fortunately her primal instincts had kicked in quickly, and they were barely burned.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>Un</span>
  </em>
  <span>fortunately, her pointer and middle finger on her right hand were now injured and out of commission for certain...activities that she had been planning on later.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She sank to the floor, anger and self-hate pumping through her blood.  “You just </span>
  <em>
    <span>had</span>
  </em>
  <span> to go and ruin everything before she even got here, Taylor.  Fucking predictable.”  Tears of frustration sprung to her eyes.  She just wanted one good thing.  Was that too much to ask for?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She gave herself 30 more seconds of self-pity.  Then, she took a deep breath, swallowed against the lump in her throat, and picked herself up off the floor.  Luckily, she’d managed to get the lasagna out of the oven before she burned herself.  She carefully picked up the pan with oven mitts and set it on the table.  She considered lighting a couple candles, but, considering her track record with heated things today, she decided against it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Satisfied with her work, Taylor dashed upstairs to change.  In her haste, she forgot to remove her apron, so she pulled it off and stuffed it in the back of a drawer.  She shuffled through her closet until she found the white sundress she’d envisioned wearing.  She stepped into it and smiled at her reflection in the mirror.  The white fabric draped loosely in a way that made her look casual and carefree.  Taylor was neither of those things, but the illusion was enough to raise her confidence.  There still weren’t many outfits that made her feel </span>
  <em>
    <span>good</span>
  </em>
  <span> like this, and she really needed that extra boost today.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She and Iris had been talking pretty much nonstop since their meeting in Paris, but this was their first time seeing each other since that night.  Iris was flying in for work and would be staying at Taylor’s for the week.  And that somehow made...whatever they were much more real.  She needed this week to go well.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A knock on the door startled Taylor out of her thoughts.  She quickly ran her fingers through her hair and swiped on some tinted chapstick.  She sprinted downstairs and pulled open the door.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hi!”  Iris’s green eyes were bright but tired.  “It’s so nice to see you!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They stood hesitantly in front of each other before Taylor broke the invisible barrier and pulled her into a hug.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I missed you.”  The words slipped out before Taylor could fully think about their implications and she froze, internally cursing herself for sounding clingy.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I missed you too,” Iris said back with such a certainty that Taylor believed her.  They pulled away slightly, looking into each others’ eyes.  “It smells amazing in here!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I made lasagna!” Taylor beamed, “I know you said you were craving it the other day, so I really hope this lives up to your expectations.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, love, you didn’t have to!  I’m so excited, this is so sweet of you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t, I love spoiling you,” Taylor said, taking Iris’s bags and starting up the stairs.  “Besides, who doesn’t love cheese and carbs?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You do have a point,” Iris said, standing at the bottom of the stairs awkwardly, unsure if she should follow.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sensing her discomfort, Taylor motioned towards her, “Come on.  We can get your stuff situated and then eat.”  They reached the doorway to her bedroom and she let go of the suitcase handle to gesture towards it.  “This is my room.”  Suddenly, she was hit with a wave of anxiety.  She’d assumed that Iris would sleep in her bed, but what if that was being presumptuous?  Sure, they’d fucked, but maybe that didn’t mean anything?  “Um, you’re obviously welcome to sleep there but I have a bunch of guest rooms down the hall as well, if you’d prefer…”  Her mouth was dry.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Iris smirked.  “Here’s perfect, don’t worry.”  Taylor smiled shakily, and tried not to look so relieved as she rolled Iris’s suitcase into a corner.  “Hey!  That’s Olivia, right?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The feline in question was sprawled on Taylor’s floor.  Iris crouched down to scratch behind her ears.  Olivia blinked sleepily and sniffed her hand.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Taylor smiled, even though her chest felt tight and she thought she might cry, for some reason.  “Yeah.  Mere and Benji are around somewhere.  It looks like she likes you, although she does like nearly everyone, so I guess that doesn’t mean much.  Meredith will definitely take a bit to warm up to you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Guess I’ll have to prepare myself,” Iris chuckled, straightening up.  “I have to make a good first impression.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>~*~</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dinner went by without a hitch.  They talked at ease about Iris’s job and Taylor’s album promo.  A glass of wine each calmed their nerves, and they settled into the warmth of each other’s presence.  After dinner, Iris helped clean up despite Taylor’s protests.  They settled into a comfortable silence as they did the dishes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I would offer to watch a movie or something, but I’m assuming you’re pretty tired,” Taylor said, wrapping her arms around Iris’s waist and resting her chin on her shoulder.  For a moment the thought crossed her mind that it had been so long since she’d been the taller one in a relationship, but she quickly brushed it aside and shifted her focus back to the present.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, I should probably get to bed soon,” Iris sighed, leaning back into Taylor.  She didn’t move though, scared to disturb the moment.  This night had been so good and she felt so </span>
  <em>
    <span>loved</span>
  </em>
  <span>.  “Before that, though, I have something for you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, babe, you didn’t have to!  I didn’t get you anything,” Taylor whined.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nonsense.  Besides, it’s not for </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span>, exactly…” she trailed off, “I’ll just give them to you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well now I’m intrigued,” Taylor smiled.  She let Iris lead her upstairs, hands intertwined.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Iris rummaged through her suitcase for a minute before pulling out 3 small knitted objects: one olive green, one pink, and one light blue.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are those...Oh my god you didn’t!” Taylor squealed in excitement.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“They’re cat sweaters,” Iris confirmed.  “I hope they fit.  I tried to pick colors to match their personalities.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You are the actual cutest person on the planet,” Taylor said, “Thank you so much.”  She leaned down to kiss her-- their first kiss of the night.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So cats really are the way to your heart, huh?” Iris smirked when they pulled away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hm?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, you did that whole bit in the ME! music video, and both of the times you’ve made a move on me were after I was talking about these stupid cat sweaters…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I guess they really are,” Taylor said, pensively.  “I mean, I wouldn’t trust someone who didn’t like cats.  I’m never dating another dog person.  That didn’t end well last time.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Iris chuckled, though there was a slight chill in the air at the mention of Taylor’s ex.  She wasn’t completely oblivious to the rumors, and after that night in Paris, Taylor had been pretty forthcoming about her relationship with Karlie.  It didn’t mean Iris wanted to be reminded of what she had to live up to.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Taylor must’ve sensed her discomfort, so she led her to the bathroom to brush her teeth.  They lay in bed next to each other, Taylor writing in a journal and Iris scrolling through instagram on her phone.  Soon, she couldn’t stop her eyes from closing.  She barely registered Taylor turning off the light and cautiously cuddling up to her before she fell asleep.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The rest of the week went by quickly.  Iris spent the days at the LA office, and the evenings with Taylor.  It scared them both, how easy it was to fit their lives together.  Iris would knit or crochet on the couch, dodging a cat or two as they curiously pawed at her yarn, while Taylor sat next to her and answered emails or read a Kennedy memoir.  They both cooked dinner, dancing around the kitchen to one of Taylor’s many curated playlists.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>On their third night together, Taylor made the mistake of bringing out her most prized possession: her scrabble board.  Both women had a natural competitive streak that was only exacerbated when they played together.  “That’s not a fucking word!  I know the scrabble dictionary front to back I swear to fucking god!  Look it up, I dare you!” Taylor yelled.  Her face was flushed and a couple strands of hair had slipped out of her ponytail.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I promise you it is.  Also, you’re hot when you’re angry,” Iris said with a smirk.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Taylor paused, and then pushed the scrabble board off the table, pieces flying everywhere.  Iris was scared she’d said the wrong thing for a second before Taylor lunged across the table and kissed her roughly.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They fucked right there in the living room, moving to the couch when the floor was too hard for Iris’s back.  Taylor's fingers still stung from when she burned them, so she made do with her tongue.  Iris didn't seem to mind.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They were silent for a while afterwards as Iris ran her fingers through Taylor’s sweaty hair.  “I won,” she whispered.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hm?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I won.  You basically forfeited by pushing the game off the table.  And besides, I was winning.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Taylor rolled her eyes and buried her face in Iris’s shirt.  “You’re impossible.”  Iris could feel her smiling against her chest, and a warm feeling started there and traveled through her chest to each of her limbs.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I think I’m falling for you.</span>
  </em>
  <span>  The thought floated through Iris’s head and, once she realized the gravity of it, fear coursed through her.  Sure, this week had been amazing, and Taylor was kind and funny and creative and bright and loving, but it had only been a week.  Well, there were the three weeks they had spent texting and facetiming whenever they had a spare moment, but still.  This was fast.  Way too fast.  Taylor was coming off a long term relationship, and Iris hadn’t dated anyone in years.  She was just lonely.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She breathed in the scent of Taylor’s flowery shampoo and planted a kiss on her head to try and calm herself.  This was ridiculous.  The two orgasms and the oxytocin running through her veins were coloring everything pink.  She would snap out of this in a second.  And, besides, they weren’t even exclusive.  Sure, Iris hadn’t been seeing anybody else, but Taylor was, well, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Taylor</span>
  </em>
  <span>.  It was naive to think that she was her only suitor.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>Get over yourself, Iris.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>But, as Taylor pulled her off the couch (“The cats are staring and I feel weird”) and upstairs, Iris felt that warmth in her chest again.  And as she looked at her reflection in the bathroom mirror, (“Go pee.  If you get a UTI you’re not allowed to tell TMZ”) hair wild and a hickey on her neck, she realized what it was.  It was </span>
  <em>
    <span>hope</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>~*~</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So is it weird?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is what weird?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I mean...she’s Taylor Swift, mate.  You realize you’ve been staying at Taylor Swift’s house.  You’ve had Taylor Swift’s fingers up your--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, point taken,” Iris giggled.  She was sprawled out on the couch talking to her friend, Kate.  Taylor had a busy day of meetings and phone interviews, so Iris was home alone.  “I mean, objectively, yeah, it’s pretty crazy, but it’s kinda unnerving how normal she is.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What’s like...the most normal thing she’s done?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh, I don’t know.  I mean, she cleans her cats’ litter.  That’s pretty normal.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shit, man.  I still can’t believe this is real life.  How are things actually going between you two, though?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Things have been great, I guess--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You guess?  Or you know?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Iris sighed and took a shaky breath.  “I don’t know.  Everything’s been so nice and it feels like we’ve been a little bubble together for the past week.  But she can be so...hard to read sometimes.  And, obviously, there’s a lot of reasons for her to be guarded, but I’m mostly just terrified that this all means more to me than it does to her.  I’m scared of how much I like her.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you really think she would’ve let you stay at her house for an entire week if she didn’t feel the same way about you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I guess not.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Exactly.  The girl is a hopeless romantic and she falls fast--have you even listened to any of her songs?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Iris smiled at that, mind going through the songs in Taylor’s discography that had been part of the soundtrack of her life in the past.  Then she compared the bright-eyed, hopeful teenager standing on a balcony in summer air to the sexy, anxious, nerdy woman she was getting to know.  They were two separate people in her mind.  “Things change.  People change.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Iris.”  Kate’s voice was a touch exasperated.  “Taylor clearly cares about you and respects you.  She’s not going to leave you the way your dad did.  You would get closure if it happened.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t want her to leave at all.”  Iris’s voice was small.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Then </span>
  <em>
    <span>tell her</span>
  </em>
  <span>.  If you want this to work, you need to put on your big girl pants and communicate.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re right.  I hate that you’re right, but you are.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m always right.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Iris laughed at that.  The weight that had been pressing on her chest felt a little lighter.  “I can think of so many examples where you weren’t right, but if that’s what you need to tell yourself…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Name one!  I bet you can’t even think of one.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uni when you told me our final was on Thursday instead of Wednesday!  When you thought you were going to marry Steve!  When you killed Ms. Carlson’s goldfish!  Shall I continue?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, okay, point taken!” Kate said through laughter.  “But I promise I’m right this time.  I’ve managed to keep Keith around for two years now, so you have to admit that I’m kind of the expert in this field.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ugh, fine,” Iris groaned, “I’ll talk to her tonight.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Call me afterwards.  If you’re not too busy fucking each--”  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Iris hung up on her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>~*~ </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was Iris’s second to last night in LA and she was freaking out.  Her conversation with Kate had been weighing on her mind all day, but she was still trying to build up the courage to talk to Taylor.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They’d spent the afternoon making egg rolls and were sampling their hard work at the bar in the kitchen.  “These are amazing,” Iris said, munching on her first bite.  “This is a good recipe!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Right?  I was kind of worried about the first ones there, but we got there in the end.  Even if sacrifices had to be made along the way.”  They both glanced at the two burnt rolls on the plate with globs of filling leaking out and then at each other.  Taylor snickered, and Iris couldn’t help but laugh with her, blushing slightly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Can I talk to you about something?” Iris said, wiping the grease off her fingers on a napkin.  For some reason, this seemed like the best time to bring it up.  She was riding off the high of their cooking success, thinking about this delicious goal they’d accomplished together.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Taylor’s laughter was abruptly cut short.  “Oh.  Yeah, of course.  It’s not...it’s not bad, is it?”  Her voice was soft and unsure.  Iris smiled at her, trying to look reassuring even though her heart was pounding so fast.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No!  I mean, I hope not.  I guess it depends on...Sorry.  Let me start over.”  She took a breath.  “This past week with you has been so lovely.  You’re an amazing person and I love being with you.  And I, uh, don’t want to be with anyone else.  I haven’t been seeing anyone else, is what I’m trying to say.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I haven’t been either,” Taylor said.  She’d swiveled in her chair to face Iris as she spoke, and now she intertwined their hands together.  Iris looked into her eyes.  They were warm.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What I’m trying to say is...Taylor, will you be my girlfriend?”  Their foreheads were touching.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Of course I will,” Taylor whispered.  She leaned in and they kissed, teeth bumping together because of their big smiles.  When they pulled apart, giggling, Taylor’s eyes were teary.  She pulled Iris into a strong hug.  “I’m so glad I met you.  I’m so lucky to have you in my life.”  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The way she said it, it sounded like a prayer.</span>
</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>hey y'all!!  here's chapter two!  we've officially written more than one full chapter of this thing (i do have some later scenes written but shhh let me have this).  i start college tomorrow, which is crazy to think about.  i've been writing fanfic since i was in 6th grade/about 11, and now i'm like...an actual adult.  wild.  thank you for your reactions to the last chapter!  i love reading all of your comments :)  chapter 3 might take a bit to come out as i adjust to zoom university lol, but i promise i will finish this thing.  thanks for reading!</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hi guys! It's been a while!  I listened to folklore, had a breakdown about kaylor breaking up, and then created an oc who would stay for Taylor to cope.  Hope you enjoy :)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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